Top ten best feelings in surfing when you're not really surfing

10.  Sitting in a toasty car after a long session
 9.  Changing in the open
 8.  The shoulder burn after a good session
 7.  Trunking it
 6.  Waxing a new board for the first time
 5.  Seeing photos/videos of yourself ripping
 4.  Punching through a closeout set
 3.  Coming out of the water and finding your car intact
 2.  Reading Foondoggy posts on alt.surfing
 1.  Pissing in your wetsuit

Top ten reasons surfers hate bodyboarders

10.  Bodyboarders take off too deep
 9.  Bodyboarders take off on the shoulder
 8.  Bodyboarders have a paddling advantage (are too fast)
 7.  Bodyboarders get in the way (are too slow)
 6.  Bodyboarders are too cocky
 5.  Bodyboarders are too passive
 4.  Bodyboarding looks stupid
 3.  Bodyboarders look like they are having too much fun
 2.  Bodyboarding is easy to learn
 1.  Bodyboarders can do things surfers will never be able to do

     It's always something...